The 3rd Annual Funniest Sports Celebrity in Washington (or whatever they called it)

This was the first time I went to the DC Improv to see the Funniest Sports Celebrity thingy.  I was waiting for my friend, but got held up, so I came in solo.  The only reason I came in is to see Marc “Nigel” Sterne.  If you remember last year’s contest, there was controversy and mayhem when Lindsay Czarniak won last year, but the applause meter went to Nigel.  I can tell you that it was justified.  Lindsay is not a good comedienne, but has “other” talents that make up for it, especially bending. 

Anyway, here was the rundown:

  • Judges were Dexter Manley, Lindsay Czarniak, Dan Hellie, the Marc Burch dude from D.C. United, some woman from SportsTalk 980 in DC with the last name Fantaskey (not kidding), and Cheese Boy (Dan Steinberg).
  • Professional comedian came up to warm-up the crowd.  Not so much.
  • Nigel was the first contestant.  I’m going to give little details of his routine:
    • The personal massage known as “Dexter.”
    • The British routine
    • “The Triangle”
    • Singing “Semen and Yogurt”
    • Funny crap!!!
  • Levan Reid from WUSA 9 here in DC wins the Peter Rosenberg Award for the worst performance of the night.
  • Some stupid intermission with singing from cue cards and another comedian.
  • SportsTalk 980’s Frank Hanrahan was next and did ok.  Nothing really popped out.
  • Former D.C. Divas running back Monica Livingston was the last contestant and had some funny material about Lesbianism.  She was very good and should do local comedy acts.
  • Last act of the night was Robert and had funny material about cereal brands trying to one up not only each other but themselves.

And the winner is…

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[Anticipation is killing you, huh?]

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MARC “NIGEL” STERNE!!!

Why this is bolded?  It was worth $35, plus the dinner I had and satisfied going home. 

Other observations from tonight:

  • I was surrounded by members of the D.C. Divas.  Yes, I was scared, but somehow hold it in pretty well.
  • Some old guy (late 50s-mid 60s) in the middle was trying to hit up on Lindsay and order her a drink.  You sly dog.
  • Cheese Boy can drink beer, even two in the same night.
  • Notable celebrities: Rick “Doc” Walker.  That’s all I have.
  • The turkey sandwich is very good.
  • For this whole event, this made me wonder:  I deserve credit to use “Zornado” in the lexicon of sports.  I don’t want money or fame, just recognition.  If you want proof, listen to Tony Kornheiser podcast from February 10, 2008.

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