The Ed Stevens Holiday Story

We left off the story in February 2004 where Ed and Carol finally got married after more than 20 years Ed was chasing Carol’s affection.  For their honeymoon, Ed and Carol didn’t go to a big city or a foreign country. They went to a hot air balloon and toss waffles all over Stuckeyville, and all of Ohio and the East Coast.  As their lives change as a married couple, everything was the same old, same old as Dr. Mike Burton still has his practice and is still in love with Nancy; Stuckey Bowl was in the handles of Phil Stubbs and Eli Goggins, and Molly was still the school principal.

2005:

Best $10 Bet: Mike challenge Ed to have a picture of a look-alike Wallace Shawn.

Stubbs gimmick: Phil discovered CafePress and started his own shirt design with his signature quote, “Shave My Poodle!” It made him modest money, but not quite enough.

As Ed and Carol settling in as a married couple, they spend a few times babysitting for the Burton kids. At those times, Ed and Carol discussed if they wanted their own kid. The both discussed and decided to go for it. Although they wanted a kid, Ed was having a tough time blending his family and work as people in town were getting hijacked with rising prices of everything from housing, property, claims as the new mayor, Mark Livingston, wants to give a boost to attract tourism in Stuckeyville.  Ed defended the people and companies to prevent the increase. Sadly, the judge ruled in favor of the mayor since the value of property has jumped and people have to pay the value. This was the beginning of the “Stuckeyville Transition.”

2006:

Best $10 bet: Ed challenge Mike that during a charity 5K race, he has to scream, “Zee Germans are coming!!! Zee Germans are coming!!!” throughout the race.

Stubbs gimmick: With Facebook and YouTube, Phil created a site called, “The People of Stuckeyville.” He posted videos, photos, and fake stories to make Stuckeyville interesting.

At first, Ed and Carol were struggling in their sex lives, so they usually called in Dr. Sue Johanson’s show to “rekindled their magic.” As for Mike and Nancy Burton, their kids were going to Kindergarten and Nancy was so scared what the school might do with her kids, she spies during lunchtime.  After a few weeks, school officials caught her spying one day and security threw her out.  Nancy then had an idea. In the same year, Molly became the superintendent of Stuckeyville schools and they had an opening for Assistant to the Superintendent. Nancy applied for the job and begged Molly for weeks to hire her. After reading the incident that Nancy was spying on her kids, Molly did not select Nancy for the position. Both ladies had a fight and the friendship almost broke apart when Nancy picked Ed to defend her from “wrongful hiring.” Ed was in a bind that he had to pick aside. Instead, remembering he was locked with Carol to make a decision to be in a relationship or not, Ed cleverly exit his office and locked the doors so Molly and Nancy figure out their problems. After 12 hours in Ed’s office, the result was settled and Molly and Nancy are friends again. Nancy will join a temp agency since it givers her flexibility to have that work/life blending.

As for Stuckey Bowl, Phil enlisted several professional bowlers to do a trick shot tournament to attract customers from Chris Barnes’s “Flying V” to Norm Duke’s “Towel Shot.” The problem was Phil didn’t tell Eli or Ed about this.  Apparently, Phil gave them appearance fees to come to Stuckey Bowl. The appearance fees damage half of Stuckey Bowl’s budget and the move made it harder to operate the bowling alley. However, the pro bowlers were nice enough to donate the money to charity under Stuckey Bowl’s name.

There was one salvation for Ed that year: Carol was pregnant.

2007:

Best $10 Bet: Mike challenges Ed to speak to Carol on the bus with his cell phone on speaker for 1 minute.

Stubbs gimmick: Phil selling his photoshopped calendar. there is one picture of Phil with the Boston Red Sox winning the World Series.

2007 was all about learning as Ed and Carol were preparing to bring in a new family member. Through most of the year, Ed and Carol took baby classes and learning from Mike and Nancy on babies. Meanwhile, Eli was the main manager of Stuckey Bowl while Ed was gone and Phil was being Phil.  Molly on the other hand, started a Stuckeyville revolution…By the way, on October 8, 2007, Carol gave birth to a 7 lb, 4 oz. boy and named him Oliver.

2008:

Best $10 Bet: Mike challenges Ed to eat 5 whole pies in 30 minutes.

Stubbs gimmick: social media (more in a bit).

A whole new Stuckeyville has come in with fiber optics, new technology, coffee shops with wi-fi, and an Apple store coming in. In turn, the economy has hit big time in Stuckeyville.  The people are mad at the Mayor Livingston for doing nothing and want to turn a town into a profit.  This is where Molly discover the power of Facebook.

Molly created a Facebook Group called, “Save Stuckeyville.” Molly gave the details about Stuckeyville’s situation.  The only problem…it has 14 people.  Then, Molly open up a Twitter account and acted herself. In one week, she got over 700 followers. She then ask the followers to join the “Save Stuckeyville” group. After that tweet, the group got an additional 250 fans.  then, Molly discovered one of her old classmates.

His name was LeGarrette James and he was a skinny black kid in Molly’s class, who likes Star Trek and The Negotiator. he went to school at Yale and got a degree in political science. He had a lot of political experience in D.C., but got sick of the town full of corruption and greed.  Molly had a chat with LeGarrette about coming back to Stuckeyville to save the town. LeGarrette was hesitant of running for mayor in his hometown, but two things he came back to Stuckeyville: to help Stuckeyville and Molly.

In the meantime, Ed had to do a lot of duties: family, being a lawyer and being the bowling alley owner. 2009 was a tough year for Ed as someone tried to sue Stuckeyville for using “his” copyrights. The person who’s suing Stuckeyville…Joe Baxter, Ed’s old nemesis.  Joe wanted to copyright everything so he can get revenge on Ed and on Stuckeyville.

With the town fight on copyrights, the economy, and the worries, changes were going to happen.  In Stuckey Bowl, business has been decent, but it can’t keep 4 employees. Eli decided to quit because he wanted back in the restaurant industry. What people didn’t know about Eli is he has a huge garden of local grown food and he had additional money from the accident that made him put in the wheelchair.  In addition, Shirley joined Eli because she wants to grow more jumping beans. Ed was upset that Shirley and Eli left, but he’s happy for the both to start a business that could benefit Stuckeyville in the long-term. It was only Ed and Phil Stubbs left. Phil thought about leaving, but he had no resources except building a social media empire under the name, Michael Ian Black. He had no success, but there were two success stories from Stuckeyville in these trying times.

The first was Ed’s brother, Lloyd, who is a get cash quick-scheme haven’t worked for a long time…until social media came. Lloyd has 1500 followers on Facebook, over 5 million connections on Linkedin, and over 500,000 followers on Twitter.  Of course, he didn’t build it organically as he paid $15 to get additional followers, but ironically enough, he was a great teacher on engagement and how to use a tools since he was a convincing actor.  Ed mention to Lloyd that you should teach small businesses on how to use social media and promote the business. Lloyd loved it and charge people $500 to take the class and use social media as “the last savior of business.”

The other success story was Stuckeyville alums Warren Cheswick and Mark Vanacore went to college together. They were average students, but the both decide in their junior year to create a podcast about their lives. They called their show, the Mark Warren Show in honor of the Harvard sociologist who looks into communities.  The first few broadcasts were raw, but the 5th episode catapult them to superstar status as Mark told a story about his gastric bypass surgery. People were relating to Mark’s situation and listeners came. In the following episode, Mark mention on air that he broke up his relationship with Diane since she was cheating with someone who was a polygamist and got hitched.  The podcast became popular and the dollars were coming and both decided to settle back to Stuckeyville.

It was a sad year in the Burton household as Dr. Walter Jerome passed away from a heart attack, giving his practice to Dr. Mike Burton. In his first act as principal, Mike reduce the practice rates and mention all doctors visits is just $10. Seeing the town hurt, Mike would want to help the community if they didn’t have healthcare.

It was a gloom and doom year in Stuckeyville with a glimmer of hope: LeGarrette James won the mayor race and the copyright case was thrown out.

2009:

Best $10 bet: Ed challenges Mike to sing “Fly Eagles Fly” at a baseball game.

Stubbs gimmick: Building a restaurant with all foods from Man v. Food.

If 2008 was about struggle, 2009 brought out secrets amongst friends. Ed, Carol, Mike, and Nancy never knew Molly and LeGarrette were an item.  In the overall picture, all of them were happy that Molly found someone.

In the Stevens household, Ed went through his computer to find that his wife has a Facebook account she forgot to log off. Ed snoop around a little and see Carol friends list and saw Dennis Martino and Phil Dunphy. Ed got so frustrated, he created his own Facebook account, add some friends, including Carol’s antagonist: Frankie Hector.  Just another day, while Carol was checking her Facebook, she sees Ed on the side as a friend recommendation.   Carol checked Ed’s profile and saw Frankie on the friend list.  It could have been prevented if Ed had tighter privacy on his account. When Ed encountered with Carol, the both had huge arguments about their old relationships and committing with each other. Then, they both heard Oliver crying upstairs. Both chased up to make Oliver stop crying. When the crying stop, Ed and Carol realize their friends are just a small part of the problem as there’s someone or something more important than others.

As for the Burtons, Nancy is still having trouble of not having the kids during school time. So, she volunteers at a library at the kids section, while Dr. Mike is doing his practice solo. His business is still steady after a high number of patients last year.

Eli started up the first organic grocery store that people can checkout through online and it has been a success. His former partner in crime at Stuckey Bowl, Phil, had a different gameplan.

While watching Man v. Food, Phil hatch an idea to compete with Eli Phil quit his day job at Stuckey Bowl and created a restaurant of all the foods made from Man v. Food. On opening day, it was huge success as Phil brought in Adam Richman for the buffet challenge, where he had to eat 15 lbs of food in 1 hour.  After a successful 1st day, business sank because people didn’t want to eat junk nearly every day. While Phil’s business fizzles, the Mark Warren gang returned.

Mark and Warren head back to Stuckeyville to return to their roots and get a second job for stability. Luckily, Ed had three vacancies. Mark and Warren agreed to worked there unless they can do a podcast at the bowling alley like Ed. He agreed and now there are three businesses going on at Stuckey Bowl. That was not the only big return at Stuckey Bowl.

The third vacancy was filled by an old Stuckey Bowl employee…Kenny Sandusky. He returned since being a movie star wasn’t as what cracked up to be. He became manager of Stuckey Bowl.

As for Lloyd Stevens, his “social media expert” lasted for 9 months in 2009 as nearly everyone in town has a social media profile, so his social media business ran out of gas, but after that, Lloyd hatch a plan for people to buy a blanket robe, also known as the “Snugxy.”

While Stuckeyville is still recovering from the economic downturn last year, there were a few who signed up early for the Festival of Ducks. The lineup has not been great, then Molly suggested a band from Ohio to play: The Black Keys. Molly message them on Facebook and agreed to perform. The message went out quick and people were signing up to the Festival of Ducks and raised a lot of money. However, there was a bonus. after the Black Keys performed, Bon Jovi made an impromptu appearance and played 5 songs to the crowd.  It was the best Festival of Ducks ever.

2010:

Best $10 Bet: Mike challenges Ed to use the iPhone and play Chatroulette in public for 10 minutes…and all of them must be strippers.

Stubbs gimmick: Try to create a viral video, auto-tune it and sell it on iTunes.

Festival of Ducks musical guest: Hall & Oates

Now that we reach 2010, here are the updates of each character:

Ed Stevens: Still married to Carol, still is the bowling alley lawyer, and is the new leader of the Stuckeyville Chamber of Commerce.

Carol Vecsey-Stevens: became a popular mommy blogger and has started a blog: Stuckeyville Moms. Is a constant speaker at mommy events, including BlogHer.

Dr. Mike Burton: Still is a doctor and principal owner of Dr. Jerome’s practice.  nothing really to it.

Nancy Burton: Site manager and writer for Stuckeyville Moms. Still volunteers for kids at the Stuckeyville Library.

Molly Hudson: Still in a relationship with Mayor LeGarrette James. Still is a superintendent of Stuckeyville schools. Handles 5 Twitter accounts.

Eli Goggins: His organic grocery is doing bang up business and could be hiring more workers next year.  Became 2010 Stuckeyville Businessperson of the Year.

Shirley Pifko: Handling the online divison for Eli’s organic grocery store. Has her own website dedicated to jumping beans.

Jerry Sandusky: Still the manager of Stuckey Bowl.

Warren Cheswick and Mark Vanacore: They have a full-time job as hosts of the Mark Warren Show. They do part-time jobs working at Stuckey bowl and help out on Eli’s organic grocery store during the holidays.

As for Phil Stubbs: His Man v. Food style restaurant didn’t pan out and agree to be work at Stuckey Bowl part-time since he has a  full time job as “Video Viralist.”

Although Stuckeyville has gone through its ups and downs, it’s the community feel and engagement that Stuckeyville has remain this strong for a long time.  For more news, go to Stuckeyville.com.

Three announcements:

  1. Darlene Love will be the main musical guest at the Festival of Ducks
  2. Oliver Stevens is doing well.
  3. Molly and LeGarrette are going to get married.

Happy Ed Stevens Holidays!!!

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